Why is it that we, as people constantly try to simplify life? Life is complicated, life is unexplainable, and life is always changing. Each day, we watch the blueprints of our surroundings put into neat little equations of our textbooks. As I say to many of my friends, if people could, they would simplify all the complications and all the workings of life into one tight, neat little equation. And then what? What goes on from there? The truth of the matter is, it will never happen, but it will always be something that humans will strive for. Now I ask all of you, what is it in our nature that makes us do so? To explain life? To find meaning? People will always try to find a meaning to life, and if they ever do succeed, then there will be nothing else but to live it. To live what we already know, to know what we are going to live, and that, my friends, is the very contradiction of life as we know it. It wouldn’t be living it would be a playwright. Actors playing out their very existence. It would be that simple equation in a textbook that never fails. Life are made of decisions, never knowing what’s behind door number one.
That is my problem with human nature. Simplifying things. Mapping out our very confused existence, so there’s an explanation, a rhyme or reason behind every doing. And that’s what psychology is. If you do so and so, and enjoy doing this and this, then you are a type A person… you are a type B person, but hardly any exception. That’s what you all are, categories, listings of people with their own little tag and label. There is no such thing as difference because once there is one other people that acts like you, then you are just listed as another “type” of person. And isn’t that what we want? The simple life? Belonging to a category? I’m a “skater”? I’m a “nerd”? I’m a “conformist”? I’m a “non-conformist”? That in itself is a contradiction! The very word that some people choose to label themselves! Once you fight conformity then you are just all the same as every other NON-conformist!
These labels people use are just terms people use to keep their mind at ease. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to know what type of person you are, how you would react to every situations like some math problem? It’s like an equation. If he calls me fat, I will cry, every time, no exception. If he jests me in front of my friends, I should get mad, every time. Or, “I’m the kind of person that doesn’t cry”, Ok, you’re family just died, you found out the world is going to end the next day, and a severe beating to the genitals and see me in the morning. There, an example of labeling yourself. “My way of living can be described by the quote, ‘Living day by day’”, Ok, that sucks man because it looks like you have no future goals to work for. My point is, exceptions. There will always be some. People soon find themselves working to fulfill the label that they imposed on themselves, rather than letting the label act as a trivial adjective to describe you for a brief amount of time. It’s like a mold that you have made for yourself so that you fit perfectly without any incongruities, or anything sticking out. That’s why I hate it when people label me. When people call me funny, I always feel a need, almost a responsibility to act humorous around them, just to fulfill the label that they imposed on me.
It’ll would be easy to map out your life with quotes, and sayings that you work to live by everyday. But sooner or later there will always be a new situation that demands an exception to the “quote” and then you won’t know what to do. It’s like a chess game. You have whole game planned out in your head, and if everything goes well according to the plan, then its a guaranteed win. If everything goes well but it never will! There will always be some different situation that you never see, some obstacles that are always blocking your sight! And keep in mind there is the opponent that is constantly tinkering away, trying to foil your every move. It just doesn’t work. That’s not the way to win a chess game, and that is definitely not the way to live life. There will always be a time when everything messes up, and you find yourself on your ass back completely lost just because “things didn’t go the way you expected it too”. And what if you did follow that simple equation that you mapped out in your head from the beginning? You’d lose, it would be like a horse with blinders on. You kept the straight path, but right into a pointed dagger, right into the hands of your opponent, who has no plan, except for the necessary ends to your demise.
My point to all this. Do NOT simplify life with quotes to live by, or self- labels to describe your character. Character itself, is forever changing. It cannot be described, it alters with every situation you are exposed to, with every single person you meet. Things don’t happen for a reason, some things happen just because. My answer? Live life as it comes to you, for each new situation, calls for a different answer. Life is an adventure, a unique experience at every turn of the clock. Life is changing, never will it be constant, an equation. Life is an exception to every rule, a different answer at every turn unpredictable and forever different.
Life is as it is.
You speak wisely. Points well made. I must say I am in agreement with your article. Good 2 hours well spent replying, eh?
-Jeff Lee
Hi Chris,
In response to your article, I’d like to say that I agree with some points but I also feel compelled to disagree with others.
Everyday we go to school for what? The obvious answer is a better future, isn’t that why you’re in school? Can you seriously tell me that you like learning about subject you would probably never use in your life? The truth is sometimes once a given path is shown and it works, people follow it. As if you get sick don’t you go to the doctor? A sick patient goes to a doctor, isn’t that itself an equation as well? Just as 1+1 always gives you two, and its proven that its 100% true, then why spend a life time proving 1+1 equals 300? I know and I think these equations of life people are creating aren’t intentional, mostly tradition. In a radical stand point it could be said that everyone should just drop out of school cause the only reason why almost majority of the people go there is because they want a brighter future; knowledge = power, are you going to tell me different?
As to labeling, this is my reply and thought. Humans are sociable creatures, liken to love birds, these birds cannot live alone or they die, as will humans. When I say, “damn I’m a nerd,” yes, I have just labeled myself, but do you not call yourself a human. I labeled myself that because I show majority traits in that category, but it won’t make me any more of a nerd then I was before I said it. I feel you are right, that sometimes it does impair or judgments, if everyone calls you a wimp or whatnot. Okay use that example, if every day people called you a wimp, would u start to believe it? I would think that you’d want to prove them different. That’s me. As I’ve known you for a long time, and I’ve been called a lot of things; fat, nerd, you name it. I wouldn’t allow myself to be further name called. Ever think it was just personality?
Now address how you act around others that think you are this type of person. Could this just be your personality? Maybe you like to make people laugh, ever think you like making people happy? “I hate it when people label me.” When people say you’re funny, I’m sure they think a lot more of you than just funny, it could be that you were just really funny at the time; it was the dominating emotion or trait you were showing. Heck I think you’re freaking funny, but you are just equally great at many other things, such as being a great friend and ext. So what do you want people to say about you? “Wow, Chris your EVERYTHING!” Hehehe. You too live by an equation, I say your funny = you try and make me laugh; no one makes set rules you do what you choose to do.
As life doesn’t always go the way it does. Isn’t that just part of life?
Everyone is there own individual, even if they follow the same equation, there outcome and experiences would all be different cause we are all individually different people.
I hope to see a comprehensive response to my reply.
-Jeff Lee
Well, I think you’ve missed my point entirely. I’m speaking from an extreme point of view. Equations work, yes, but I’m speaking about something deeper than 1+1=2. Example. There are many unexplainable things that exist in the universe that we don’t understand. But rather than accept things for just the way it is, we as arrogant human beings try to put it in simpler terms in order for us to understand it. Yes, it is respectable that people never take things for what it is, but isnt that also a flaw? I say arrogance because it is too hard, almost impossible to believe that some things are just not meant for us to understand, and I speak of things from a higher level. You see, rather than admit defeat, we produce ridiculous theories in order for us to understand it. Instead of acceptance, we make answers so… out there, so… perhaps stupid, in order for us to understand it. And once those radical, crazy theories are produced, it becomes fact, whether we like it or not. My example? the big bang, darwins theory, evolution. Yes there are evidence, but just about enough evidence as the bible, and more people tend to fight against the bible instead. That’s my problem. We make things so WE understand it, no matter how ridiculous or stupid, so long as we understand it. We could be TOTALLY off the real truth, but as long as we can see it, as long as we can understand it, as long as we can reason, then it must be true. It would be nice if we could see theory in an objective sort of view, but thanks to public schools, it becomes reality instead of theory. Then “theory” becomes “tradition” then “tradition” becomes this long-rooted “fact” that society believes.
As for labeling, yes, I believe if a person calls me funny, it is a PART of my personality, but not ALL of my personality, let alone a dominating trait of my personality. It could be that one moment in time that I’m funny, but are you telling me when someone’s called you “nice” you’ve never felt impelled to obey that statement? To continue being nice to that person? You feel that it is almost a responsibility that the majority of the time spent with that person will be acted out as a “nice” person, BECAUSE they assumed that the majority of your personality is made of compassion. And yes, I myself am human but thats an entirely different kind of label, thats more of a physical aspect than character. And if you did mean character then yes, obviously I do feel compelled to be human because anything less would be a “savage”.
Do you know one of the largest reasons for rebellious kids these days? The reason why most of the problematic kids in society lash out is because of their childhood. In school, they maybe made a bad impression on the first day of school. The teacher, in all his wisdom therefore labeled the kid as a “bad” kid. And for the rest of the year, no matter how hard that person tries, his actions are misunderstood, and often misinterpreted for spite. As the years pass by, his peers and his parents continue treating him as if he is the bane of the flock, and eventually he will act out the role society has placed upon him without even knowing it.
So I hope this answers your questions and yes, I agree that everyone IS their own individual, but only because they rebel in some way against the label or role that society has placed upon them.
As you said, life does go on. So why dont we let it?
-Chris
Its simple, people want answers. Why is my kid dying? I don’t know. That kind of answer is just not sufficient enough to get us anywhere, if I were that child’s parent. I rather know a blind “probable” then a shoulder shrug from a doctor; wouldn’t you? I used this as an exampled as it is more tangible. Yes, big bang, evolution, bible. I put them in the same category, because to me they all seem a bit farfetched and intangible. To me each of those have just as much credibility as the next. The truth is society is made of “average” people; I’m sure we’ve all met our share of “average people” they don’t want to think for themselves. What they want is a quick, easy, answer. That’s what they want, and that’s what people give. Then there are the few “free thinkers” as I’d like to call them, which is more knowledgeable, and able to DECIDE for them whether the “facts” presented to them are true and creditable.
And yes I do agree that when someone calls me “nice” I sometimes am nicer to them, but not “compelled” to be. ‘Cause we aren’t playing for brownie points here, its because when someone calls me nice they pay me a compliment and I FEEL that this person is nice to me too. If this person treated me like crap even if he did call me nice, I wouldn’t believe or do a word he says.
As to the rebellious kid, yes, sadly society does screw people over.
-Jeff Lee
-Jef-
Yes, well, hasn’t that always been the problem of society? “Average” people? People who just accept facts as presented to them? Mindless dummies. Hah, people always want answers for things that’s happening to THEM, but the questions to existence isn’t exactly a fact that HAS to be unraveled. Don’t get me wrong, I think it is a very admirable trait of people to challenge unanswerable questions to life, but it is the way that people cope with the answers that are produced that bothers me.
Maybe that was a bad example. I was trying to avoid personal examples. But how can you say you’ve never felt the obligation to fulfill or contradict someone’s view about you? How about this, you said before that people used to call u “Fat, and Nerdy” did you not feel compelled to prove them wrong? Yes, this is somewhat of an alteration to my statement from the original article but my point is any labeling will AFFECT the way you act around that person. And it has, you began working out and losing weight to prove that you just weren’t some computer nerd, and so you once too have felt compelled to act a certain way around people. And c’mon, the way you and me act around girls??? I won’t even GO there =p
-Chris